Tuesday, January 20, 2009

If you're gonna have sex, at least close door....

And put on some music.


I'm happy that people have sex in my building.


I am.

I just don't want to hear it.

For a while, there was this one girl in my building who would scream so loud, 1/2 the time I thought I should call the police. But after listening for a while, I realized she was ok, not screaming for her life (it's a big city; you can never be too careful).

And over the years, there comes a time when, if you live with a roommate, you're going to hear them, right?

Well, here are some helpful tips.

1. Put on some music - yes, amazingly enough, a little music might cover your screams and moans.
2. Close your door. Yes, I understand the wind might blow it open - that's why you should close it!! And hey, if you are lucky enough to have 2 doors to your room - close BOTH of them!
3. I know you're in a hurry to get laid, but at least have the decency to close the front door to the apartment. Again, it is a city and you never know what pervert or criminal might be walking by!
4. If you're going to be having THAT much sex, you really owe it to yourself to get your own apartment. Or at least go to his place if you're going to make that much noise without giving your roommate warning. Seriously!!


jennhi said...

Ugh. I feel your pain.

Besides all the times I had to listen to it, the funniest story about it was told by a friend of mine in college. She and I met up in a common room to walk to orchestra practice together, and I was a couple minutes late. She was waiting on the couch, and I asked if she'd been waiting long. She replied that she'd actually been there for about 20 minutes because she REALLY needed to leave her dorm room. I asked why. Her response:
"Well, let's just put it this way. I now know the name of my next door neighbor's boyfriend. It's 'OhEricOhEricOh'."

jennifery said...

LOL that's hysterical!!